The phone dinged a text through my subconscious brain at ten past seven as I slept beside Penny in London the next morning. It was Peter.

Call me.

I texted back.

 For what?

I need to talk to you urgently.

I’m about to wake this beautiful model up in the nicest way she has ever been woken in her life.

Carry on then, don’t let me disturb something of greater import, text me when she’s been purified.

What do you need?

Her thong.

The one from last night or the one from tonight.

Either or both. I’m so proud of you, grasshopper. 

My life is complete.

Fuck off.

What do you really need?

I want for nothing myself, young maestro, but Mam wants a bottle of Remy Martin from the Duty Free.

Ellen can have anything she wants.

She’d also love a giant pack of rainbow condoms, large of course, and a pair of furry handcuffs, hers are broken.

Lend her yours.

God forbid.

I laughed quietly, put the phone back down on the bedside table and snuggled under the covers.

Penny woke quietly as I watched her. One eye flickered open, followed shortly by the other. She saw me through the early morning haze as her eyes adjusted to the new day. Her left hand reached for me as she smiled a soft contented smile.

“Good morning,” she croaked.

I slid over to her and kissed her lips.

“Good morning, love,” I whispered, “you look beautiful in the morning.”

“Thank you. What time is it, please?” she asked.

“A little after seven.”

“Did you sleep ok?”

“Yes, believe me, I had no trouble sleeping, Penny. You?”

“Oh Jesus, I don’t think I’ve ever felt so rested in my life, Tony.”

I touched her face and kissed her lips. She interlaced her fingers through mine and held it to her cheek. She smiled sleepily.

“A penny for your thoughts, if you’ll pardon the expression, no pun intended,” I whispered.

She laughed and kissed my hand.

“I’ve no thoughts beyond coffee, will I order some up?”

“Yes, that’d be a plan,” I said, “but first I’d like to help you wake up.”

“How do you propose to do that?”

I kissed her lips and she released my hand, pulling me close, intensifying the emotion of our touch.

“Can I shower first?” she whispered in my ear, “I lost count of how many times I came last night and I should really make myself presentable.”

“Penetrable?”

“Presentable! You fucker.”

“You go shower then and let me watch your fabulous bum walk across the room. I’ll order coffee for us.”

“You’re such a gentleman.”